Following Shakopee Warehouse Eviction, Mike Lindell Announces Plan To Build New Warehouse Entirely From Pillows

Original photo by Gage Skidmore

In what can only be described as a fluff-tastic turn of events, notorious election skeptic and pillow magnate Mike Lindell has announced an unorthodox solution to his being evicted from one of his warehouses over $217,000 in unpaid rent: building a new warehouse entirely from pillows.

But with his well-documented financial troubles and penchant for denying reality, will Lindell’s plan unravel faster than cheap polyester?

“Why pay rent when you can just build your own warehouse out of pillows?” Lindell reportedly quipped, adding, “When life gives you lemons, you can always make a pillow fort,” a saying that left reporters bewildered.

While some skeptics have questioned the feasibility of Lindell’s scheme, citing concerns about stability, functionality, and the potential for a massive pillow fight breaking out, Lindell remains undeterred.

“This is the future of warehousing, folks. Soft, cozy, and proudly Made in America,” he declared while laying down the first pillow to the site’s foundation.

As Lindell persists in his pillow-centric business strategy, one thing is clear: in the unpredictable world of MyPillow, anything is possible, seemingly even constructing castles from feathers …