MINNEAPOLIS — University of Minnesota scientists announced today that they’ve successfully implanted memories of the 1991 Halloween blizzard directly into a mouse’s brain.
The experiment was the culmination of over a decade of research into how and where memories relating to the infamous snowstorm are stored in the brain.
“We administered a series of slight electric shocks to very specific areas of the rodent’s hippocampus,” explained the team’s leader, neuroscientist Dr Clara Simon, “and now the rodent 100% remembers getting all dressed up as a tiny Ghostbuster for Halloween but having to cover up his costume with snow-pants to trek through the rapidly accumulating snow and then helping his father shovel the driveway the following day.”
The mouse has reportedly been attempting to relay the fond memories to friends in his enclosure via a series of squeaks and hand motions, sadly to no avail.
“We hope to next find a way to allow mice, and eventually humans, to swap memories of that memorable meteorological event telepathically via electronic chips imbedded in the brain” said neurologist Dr Abshir Abdi, “by 2030, you will be able to walk up to a stranger and relay your recollections of October 31, 1991 without even speaking. It’s every Minnesotans dream”.
The project wasn’t without its setbacks.
“This was actually our second attempt,” said lab technician Jon Borkowski, “the first time we didn’t stimulate the brain enough and the mouse became convinced that he remembered 1991 but that it ‘wasn’t that bad’ and was ‘only a few inches at most’ so we had to start over from scratch”.
To further confirm their findings, the team also hopes to give the mouse memories of the 1991 World Series, the day Jesse Ventura won the governorship, and getting lost at Camp Snoopy.