Tyler Martindale
General Mills Reveals That They Accidentally Leaked Thousands Of Customers’ Addresses To The Cookie Crisp Wolf
MINNEAPOLIS — In what is being called an ‘unprecedented’ security breach, Minnesota-based foodstuffs manufacturer General…
OPINION: St. Paul Public Schools Have NO Right To Tell My Daughter She Is Evil Simply Because She Is White (And Also Evil)
This is what the founding fathers warned us about. The sinister Marxist ideology of “critical…
Representation Win: Sesame Street Just Added A New Puppet From Edina Who Keeps Telling Oscar The Grouch To Learn How To Code
It’s about time! The latest episode of the beloved educational children’s show ‘Sesame Street’ introduced…
On This Day In Minnesota History: Rocky And Bullwinkle Are Arrested In Tehran Attempting To Free Iranian Hostages
On today’s date in 1980, beloved Frostbite Falls, Minnesota residents Rocket “Rocky” J. Squirrel and…
DNR Designates Far End Of Rogers Target Parking Lot A Protected Habitat For Exhausted People Who Just Want To Sit, Eat Their Little Snack, And Cry
ROGERS — The Minnesota Department of Natural Resources has officially allocated the far end of…
Embarrassed Bear Cub Can’t Believe Mom Is Mauling Guy’s Face Off In Front Of All His Friends
ITASCA COUNTY — Bashfully covering his face with his paws, a 10-month-old black bear cub…
5 Ways To Cheer Up Your Landlord Who’s Feeling Down After Rent Control Passage
After St. Paul voters passed one of the most progressive rent control policies in the…
Sun Country Announces New Flights From MSP To Where Ever They Fucking Feel Like
MINNEAPOLIS — In anticipation of a massive increase in the number of holiday travelers since…
Farmer Discovers Sequel To Kensington Runestone About Goofy Time Three Vikings Had To Raise A Baby
KENSINGTON — In what could prove to be one of the most important archaeological finds…
Weird Guy Practicing Nunchucks In Crossroads Center Parking lot Earns Star On St. Cloud Walk Of Fame
ST. CLOUD — A weird guy who can often be seen practicing nunchucks in the…
Yikes: It Turns Out The Great Pumpkin Has Some Problematic Views On Gender Roles
The Great Pumpkin is in hot water this week after controversial statements the revered supernatural…
5 Times The Wisconsin Department Of Tourism Tried To Get Jason Momoa To Move There
For the better part of the last decade, the Wisconsin Department of Tourism has poured…
Report: 98% Chance Jacob Frey Currently Reading This Article About How He’s A Baby And We Hate Him
MINNEAPOLIS — A newly published study by sociologists at the University of Minnesota has concluded…