Welcome to the Aquatenniel, Minneapolis’ premier celebration of the invention of the color aqua, or maybe the band Aqua, or maybe something else! Who knows! Everyone is afraid to ask even though we are in dire need of clarification!
Many of you think you are here to celebrate the 1919 invention of the color aqua. With soldiers coming home from World War I, the United States needed a lift: at the time, only the three primary colors had been invented (complementary colors wouldn’t be invented until after World War II). At least a few of you think that Minneapolis’ own Reginald Aquavarious, a simple flour boy toiling away at Pillsbury at the time, came up with this revolutionary fourth color, giving it his name. With a new, bright blue to play with, a playful mood swept the nation, moving our citizens from a time of war to a time of reverie. Unfortunately for Reginald, Target acquired the patent, which is why they now put on these kickass fireworks! Or at least that’s the current prevailing theory!
Or maybe you think you are here to celebrate that band with the Barbie Girl song, yes, Danish-Norwegian pop group Aqua’s smash 1919 hit! With a large Norwegian immigrant population that had never considered dancing in their lives, “Barbie Girl” was a revelation to many Leifs and Bjørns around the city. Minneapolis was home to so much fanfare due to the song that choruses of “come on Barbie, let’s go party!” echoed across the Mississippi, inspiring F. Scott Fitzgerald to write The Great Gatsby and forcing lawmakers to enact Prohibition, or that’s at least our best guess right now. Today, we can enjoy the Torchlight Parade, the largest nighttime parade in Minnesota and some believe a re-enactment of the protests of angry mobs in the 1920s trying to discern why that creepy guy with the deep voice was even part of the band in the first place! Enjoy the festivities throughout the city, and please call 311 with answers!
Thank you for joining us to celebrate Minneapolis’ Aquatenniel! As Mayor Jacob Frey has said, “Does anyone really know what’s going on here? The color is ok, not my favorite for a knit tie, but have you listened to the lyrics from that song? It’s so creepy! Why are we doing this?”
Here’s to another 100 years of maybe the color, or quite possibly the band! If anyone finds out, please let us know immediately!