Wayzata to Host Father-Son Emotional Distance Fun Run

WAYZATA — As COVID restrictions ease, more cities across the Twin Cities metro look forward to bringing back traditions that were put on pause this last year, and Wayzata is no different—this July, they will again host the annual Father-Son Emotional Distance Fun Run.

“It’s crucial that we bring back some of the events that make living in this fair city such an honor, such a privilege, such a joy. That’s why we’re delighted to watch our sons and daddies compete again!” says Father-Son Emotional Distance Fun Run chair Dottie Foster.

This now 75 year tradition, originally conceived as the official kick-off to boat shoe season, brings together local father and son teams for a “fun run” which is actually a race to see which son can bring their father a glass of scotch down Wayzata Boulevard the fastest without spilling a single drop. 

The winning father-son team each receive a custom pair of Dockers khaki shorts with their family crest embroidered on the back pockets and the winning son receives the coveted “silent nod of acknowledgement” from his father. 

The losing sons receive the customary “cold shoulder of filial disgrace” from their losing fathers. Any sons who spilled any scotch along the fun run route must return to each drop or puddle and reflect on how they’ve “disrespected the gentlemen’s drink.”

“I for one am looking forward to getting back into my boat shoes and back on the boulevard to show my father that he can trust me with his acknowledgment and business” 38 year-old Carter Ambrose, a VP at his father Cyrus Ambrose’s deforestation company tells us. “My father hasn’t looked at me directly in five years and I think this will be the year I can prove that I truly deserve his nod.”

The Fun Run is set to take place on June 7th and will be followed by the even older Wayzata tradition of tying a young woman to the train tracks to be saved at the last minute by her father’s business associate and become his bride.