RICHFIELD — While she never wanted to be the type of woman to have a meltdown in a public coffeeshop, local woman Hannah McCrea, 34, is on the verge of one in Richfield Caribou Coffee.
“I just ordered a medium pumpkin spice nitro latte with whip and oat milk. If it doesn’t come out right, I’ll probably just scream and run into traffic.” said McCrea while on the scene.
McCrea, who has been hanging on by a thread for approximately 36 hours, reportedly had to repeat her order twice over the noise of the coffee shop, which caused her left eye to twitch noticeably. Sources say that McCrea is currently biting her nails and watching the barista like a hawk, waiting for the universe to give her permission to openly weep in public.
“I just— I just— I know it’s not that important in the grand scheme of things, I do,” said McCrea, whose hands were shaking. “But like, I really cannot take one more fucking thing.”
At press time, the Caribou barista had stopped working on McCrea’s drink in order to troubleshoot something going on with the drive thru headset, and McCrea was practicing deep breathing techniques.