Yaaas! For Pride Month, General Mills Announced That Toucan Sam Is Gay Now Even Though He’s Owned By Kellogg’s

Now this feels like a big step forward for LGBTQ+ acceptance! 

Minnesota’s own General Mills has decided to celebrate Pride Month by making the incredible announcement that Toucan Sam is gay even though they ostensibly have no power to do that because he’s owned by Kellogg’s, a completely different company.

General Mills dropped the news via their official Twitter account by simply saying “Toucan Sam is gay now” and posting an image of the beloved cereal mascot standing in front of a waving rainbow flag with a speech bubble that says “I am Toucan Sam and I am gay”. 

“We would have made one of our own mascots like the Lucky Charms leprechaun or the Cookie Crisp wolf gay but then after June is over, we’d obviously have to switch him back to straight which would look bad,” said General Mills CEO Jeff Harmening, “because we couldn’t just have a gay mascot outside of pride month. I mean, come on!”

When asked about possible legal repercussions, Harmening said, “What are they going to do? Sue us to make Toucan Sam straight again? It’s a PR checkmate.”

Well, he’s got a point there.

After their original announcement, General Mills, seemingly high on their newly discovered power to decide the sexual orientation of a rival company’s intellectually property, tweeted to declare that while they’re at it, the Honey Smacks frog is bisexual and Tony the Tiger is questioning where he stands on the sexuality spectrum which is totally ok too. 

They also made the groundbreaking proclamation that Snap, Crackle, and Pop are in a polyamorous relationship, which honestly might be pushing their luck a little.

When asked what he thinks of these incredible announcements, Kellogg’s CEO Steve Cahillane, having been defeated by General Mills superior PR jiu-jitsu, simply sighed and told reporters, “I guess Toucan Sam is gay now.”

That’s the spirit! Hopefully, more corporations start doing this sort of thing!