ST. PAUL — With congress allotting $373 billion to help fight the climate crisis, many Minnesotans are eager to see one particular result of this investment: the successful reburying of Minnesota under two miles of glacial ice.
The new budget provides $350 million for electric vehicles, $1.75 billion for wind and solar farms, and over $370 billion to encapsulate the entire state in a block of ice.
“I’m excited for Minnesota to resemble something similar to those Ice Age Movies,” said Governor Walz at a press conference Monday. “I want every Minnesotan to feel the same way I felt when that mammoth and his buddies saved that baby.”
Walz also detailed plans to send every Minnesotan a copy of Ice Age 2: The Meltdown as part of an educational program on climate change.
While the policy is still in its beginning stages, experts are positive that the project will be a resounding success, but some claim there’s still more to be done. “Why stop there?” said Aaron Merrick, a professor of environmental science at Macalester College. “We could also have every Minnesotan start dumping their ice trays outside, or even turn their ACs on full blast while propping the windows open.”
With support from both government officials and leading experts, the mass-freezing of the entire state is set for completion in 2025 and will be celebrated with a ribbon cutting ceremony attended by the cast of Ice Age, including Ray Romano and John Leguizamo.