Lake Bde Maka Ska Offers $35 to Rent a Canoe or $15 for the Memory To Be ‘Total Recalled’ Straight Into Your Mind

As many Minneapolitans tackle their summer bucket lists, one popular activity is renting a canoe or kayak and touring the urban lakes in Uptown. Can-You-Canoe?, a water recreation rental company, has taken this classic activity and updated it with a modern twist. Inspired by the 1990 action movie Total Recall, Can-You-Canoe uploads a memory of a 30-45 min activity directly into your brain. 

Spokesperson Ryan Bangert explained, “Previous years a lot of people would come up to the booth and you could tell that they wanted to do something that seemed summer-y but not a lot of people actually want to paddle around and get sunburned. This solves that problem. It’s like the ‘I Voted’ sticker without having to vote.”

Ryan said one demographic in particular loves the feature: long time locals.

“I wish more places had this. There are so many things in this city that I have no interest in doing, but if I say I haven’t been to Minnehaha Falls or been to Art-A-Whirl I get so much shit for it.” Said Seward resident Rahletta Michaelson. She continued, “I’d love one of these for Rock the Garden.” 

Can-You-Canoe also offers Instagram services to ensure you get the perfect selfie that will make your mom stop bothering you about how you don’t get out enough.