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Maiden Voyage of USS Minneapolis-st. Paul Runs Aground After Failing To Execute Downriver Zipper Merge

1 day ago Brian Murphy
  • News
  • Twin Cities

After Five Years Teachers Can Resume Field Trips To See Sparky the Sea Lion at Como Zoo, and Multiple Questions of ‘Why Does Sparky Look Different?’

1 day ago Catherine Hansen
  • News

Couple Clearly Phoning in Third Maternity Photoshoot

1 day ago Rick Baustian
  • News

Know Before You Go: All 30 Documents You’ll Need to Apply for a Real ID

1 day ago Tyler Martindale
  • News

New York Times Editors Finally Admit They Cannot Find Minnesota on a Map

1 day ago Ben Friedman
  • Editor's Choice
  • News

How To Make New Friends By Learning To Make Your Own American Girl Dolls

6 months ago Denzel Belin
  • Editor's Choice
  • News

Local Woman Wonders When Her Relationship with the DFL Will Move on from the Texting Stage

7 months ago Cass Foust
  • Editor's Choice
  • News

Embarrassing: This 8-Year-Old Kid Still Can’t Do A Loon Call

7 months ago Lily Meyer
  • Editor's Choice
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  • Politics

MPD Dumps Cooler of Gatorade on Frey

7 months ago Aron Woldeslassie
  • Featured
  • News

General Mills Reveals That They Accidentally Leaked Thousands Of Customers’ Addresses To The Cookie Crisp Wolf

5 months ago Tyler Martindale

MINNEAPOLIS — In what is being called an ‘unprecedented’ security breach, Minnesota-based foodstuffs manufacturer General…

  • Featured
  • News

Ancient, Underground Maurices Unearthed During Digging in Downtown Duluth

6 months ago Bianca Nkwonta
  • Featured
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OPINION: St. Paul Public Schools Have NO Right To Tell My Daughter She Is Evil Simply Because She Is White (And Also Evil)

6 months ago Tyler Martindale

This is what the founding fathers warned us about. The sinister Marxist ideology of “critical…

  • Editor's Choice
  • News

How To Make New Friends By Learning To Make Your Own American Girl Dolls

6 months ago Denzel Belin

Howdy there, young outcast! So, Anna Rose won’t let you sit at her table for…

  • Featured
  • News

Five Very Real Fish Facts To Help You Talk to Your Uncle This Holiday Season

6 months ago Em Kueppers

Holidays are always stressful, made even more so as you mentally gear up to talk…

  • Featured
  • News

Nordly Staff Already Tired of Writing Jokes for Frey’s Second Term

6 months ago Maddie Spott

As the days grow shorter, so does The Nordly Staffs’ patience when it comes to…

  • Featured
  • News

Wow! This Woman Became Carbon-Negative By Only Traveling By Pedal Pub

6 months ago Cass Foust
  • Featured
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Oops: Due To An Irreversible Typo, The National Infrastructure Bill Will Add 4.8 Billion Lanes To Highway 10 In Elk River

6 months ago admin
  • News

Representation Win: Sesame Street Just Added A New Puppet From Edina Who Keeps Telling Oscar The Grouch To Learn How To Code

6 months ago Tyler Martindale

It’s about time! The latest episode of the beloved educational children’s show ‘Sesame Street’ introduced…

  • News

On This Day In Minnesota History: Rocky And Bullwinkle Are Arrested In Tehran Attempting To Free Iranian Hostages

6 months ago Tyler Martindale

On today’s date in 1980, beloved Frostbite Falls, Minnesota residents Rocket “Rocky” J. Squirrel and…

  • News

DNR Designates Far End Of Rogers Target Parking Lot A Protected Habitat For Exhausted People Who Just Want To Sit, Eat Their Little Snack, And Cry

6 months ago Tyler Martindale

ROGERS — The Minnesota Department of Natural Resources has officially allocated the far end of…

  • News

Thanks, I Guess: Jesse Ventura Just Donated The Rest Of A Chicken Salad Sandwich He Ate The Day He Was Elected Governor To The Minnesota Historical Society

6 months ago Tyler Martindale
  • News

Embarrassed Bear Cub Can’t Believe Mom Is Mauling Guy’s Face Off In Front Of All His Friends

6 months ago Tyler Martindale

ITASCA COUNTY — Bashfully covering his face with his paws, a 10-month-old black bear cub…

  • Featured
  • News

Edina Woman Confused Why the $75 She Spent on Feminist Tchotchkes at Patina Didn’t End Institutional Racism and Sexism

6 months ago Morgan Gray

MINNEAPOLIS — They say that money can’t buy you happiness, but one Minneapolis resident hoped…

  • Featured
  • News

Isanti Couple’s Wedding Announcement Almost Indistinguishable From Cabela’s Catalogue

7 months ago Morgan Gray

ISANTI — Wedding bells will soon be in the air for Isanti couple Trisha Erickson…

  • News

5 Ways To Cheer Up Your Landlord Who’s Feeling Down After Rent Control Passage

7 months ago Tyler Martindale

After St. Paul voters passed one of the most progressive rent control policies in the…

  • News

How’d He Get in There: Counting Crow’s Lead Singer Adam Duritz Just Released from Prince’s Vault

7 months ago Morgan Gray
  • News

Sun Country Announces New Flights From MSP To Where Ever They Fucking Feel Like

7 months ago Tyler Martindale

MINNEAPOLIS — In anticipation of a massive increase in the number of holiday travelers since…

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Featured

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Uh Oh! The Andrews Sisters Have Challenged HAIM to a Duel from Beyond the Grave Again

4 months ago Morgan Gray
  • Featured
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A Terrible Omen: Culver’s Frozen Custard Flavor of the Day Is “Just Vanilla”

4 months ago Tyler Martindale
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  • Sports

Opening of MOA’s Museum of Failure Delayed for Additions to Minnesota Vikings Exhibit

4 months ago Brian Matuszak
  • Featured
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Eden Prairie Parents Demand School Casts White Kid As Othello

4 months ago Denzel Belin
  • Featured
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Five Chaste Ways to Shoot Your Shot at Church Bae During This Year’s New Years Eve Service

5 months ago Bianca Nkwonta

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Maiden Voyage of USS Minneapolis-st. Paul Runs Aground After Failing To Execute Downriver Zipper Merge

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After Five Years Teachers Can Resume Field Trips To See Sparky the Sea Lion at Como Zoo, and Multiple Questions of ‘Why Does Sparky Look Different?’

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Couple Clearly Phoning in Third Maternity Photoshoot

1 day ago Rick Baustian
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Know Before You Go: All 30 Documents You’ll Need to Apply for a Real ID

1 day ago Tyler Martindale
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New York Times Editors Finally Admit They Cannot Find Minnesota on a Map

1 day ago Ben Friedman
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