State’s Fancy Men in Top Hats, Monocles Demand To Be Given Vaccine First
Hundreds of Minnesota’s finest gentlemen gathered outside the State Capitol building today demanding that they…
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Cornhole Tournament To Determine Who Gets First Dibs on COVID Vaccine
Epidemiologists announced this past weekend that they have made a decision regarding who will get…
Guthrie Adds Crinkling Cough Drop Wrapper Sound To Virtual Christmas Carol
After conceding to the fact that theaters actually need to produce products to get donation…
Man Trying To One Up Neighbor’s Nativity Set Starting To Think Fake Goat Droppings, Amniotic Fluid A Little Too Realistic
After more than a week of being locked in an intense struggle to one-up his…
Edina Hockey Team Gears Up to Live Out Missed 2020 Hockey Season Vicariously Through Future Children
EDINA — With the Minnesota High School Sports League shortening the season for all winter…
Absolute Legend: Mason Just Changed His Zoom Background In The Middle Of Class To A Picture Of Freakin’ Deadpool
BROOKYLN PARK — Woodland Elementary student Mason Martin became the coolest student in his fifth-grade…
MNSure Now Offering 284 Insurance Plans For Each Individual Bone, Organ
Online health insurance marketplace MNSure will now offer 284 distinct insurance plans for each individual…
Anishinaabe Leaders Approve Oil Pipeline Through Governor’s Mansion
If you laughed at this headline, support the Indigenous water protectors fighting Line 3. https://www.stopline3.org/
Minnesota’s New COVID App Promises Non-Confrontational Alerts
Patch notes for the new COVID contact tracing app co-produced by the State of Minnesota…
Santa’s Workshop Consults Mayo Clinic for COVID-19 Protocols
ROCHESTER — Over the course of the pandemic, countless world leaders and media outlets have…
Breaking: Dasher Fired From North Pole Over Proud Boys Connection
The second most popular reindeer Dasher has filed suit against Kris Kringle LLC, claiming he…